Friday, June 09, 2006

Love & Anger part 1.

In a conversation recently, we were talking about - well actually it is 2 different topics but kindof related... One has to do with how Christians and/or the church communicates bad news. The other topic is how does the kingdom of God work when there is anger, resentment, bitterness et al, between at least 2 members.

Well let's jump in. If we believe 1 John, when he talks about Loving One Another as a sign of knowing that we love God. And specifically Chap 3, verse 12 - "Do not be like Cain who belonged to the evil one and murdered his brother. And why did he murder him? Because his own actions were evil and his brother's were righteous." Wait a minute! Cain & Abel had the same parents. They got the same theological up-bringing. So what happened to Cain? Why was he the one who sided with the evil one? Without looking too deeply at the nature of Cain's "gift", let's just look at the result. Cain & God had a conflict. Abel, the younger brother offered a sacrifice that pleased God. God gave Cain a reasonable warning and a way to redeem his error. But Cain HATED his brother and took out his anger on Him. Cain's offense was with God. Abel did nothing to displease Cain. Rather than reconciling to God - Cain hated & murdered Abel.

So what is that with us today? Well try this: There is brokenness in relationships between Christians all the time. Some are probably deserved, some are certainly not deserved. But if we believe 1st John - then we should be marked by the love we have for each other. John goes so far as to say that if we do not have Agape Love for our brothers & sisters then we probably do not know God in the first place (Eww! how harsh!). This agape has to supercede the anger and hatred.

How can I control that anger? That is the 'Sin that is crouching at the door'. Many times we use the "doormat" excuse as a way to justify the anger. We'll say: "I'm tired of being treated like a doormat." Many times that is just the rationalization that we offer. First of all I am so glad that Jesus did not have that attitude when the pharisees were building their case or the townspeople were flocking to be healed! Doug Holladay use to tell me: "Being a Christian is like being a deadman on furlough" That is my life is already spent (actually given over to God) anything that happens to me is just part of my furlough. I can't be a doormat, I'm already a sacrifice.

How can I be reconciled to my brother? Many times the 'flaw' is something that can't be talked about. It might be a personality trait or a naive behavior or an incorrect perception. It is easier to talk about the situation to others than it is to talk to the person. And because of anger (that creeps in) we say things that we regret, but repress. I must try to keep short accounts. When 'offended' I need to go to my brother and try to reconcile.

How can I love (agape) through that anger? If I hate someone this could lead to 'murder' (maybe just in character, but murder nonetheless). But if I purpose (with God's help) to Agape someone then this leads to sacrifice. I will sacrifice to love this person who I hate. Is that possible? NO of course not, but that is where God comes in. He wanted to help Cain deal with his anger, to present a worthy sacrifice and to live rightly.

I know of situations in the Christian community where Godly people have taken to bitter words to justify their positions at the expense of innocent people. And to be honest, sometimes those bitter words & thoughts are from me. Let this new Agape begin today!

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