So what's his passion?

I overheard a conversation the other day. A young man was talking to a dad about the dad's son, (a friend of the young man).

DAD: "I am pretty sure once we get him back here he will be able to settle down into a good job and he'll be fine."

YOUNG MAN: "Well what is Steven's (not his real name) passion? Does he have any idea?

DAD: "Passion? Passion! Does it have to be about passion? All I want him to do is to do what he's supposed to do. To get a good job, to take care of his wife, to raise a family. We never even thought about passion."

YOUNG MAN: "I just think unless he is doing something that he is passionate about he won't be happy. He won't be able to sustain himself. He won't be able to stay in it for the long term. And so he will continue to flounder."

I hear this conversation over and over. It seems like as we travelled this summer I kept hearing these thoughts.

It took on different forms. From BABY-BOOMERS I would hear - "Ok, I am so done with this day to day stuff. I never thought it would be like this. I anticipated a higher sense of satisfaction and accomplishment."
or "I thought it was about the money or things, but now I realize I just want to come home, sit on the deck with a few friends, or just watch football."

From BABY-BUSTERS I hear them saying: "I just want to be able to play with my kids."
or "I would like to try being Mr. Mom for a year or so."
or "I am tired of working for someone else, I just want to branch out on my own and start a ________________ (coffeehouse, small law firm, bookstore, music store, etc)."

From MILLENNIALS I hear: "I had this job, but it just wasn't my passion so I quit."
or "I have a lot of opportunities right now, but I don't want to do anything until I know for sure it is the right thing."
or "I just want to experience more of life before I have to settle down."

I think Boomers (and I 'are' one)wanted independence before all things. We were convinced that our parents never 'got-it'. So whether it was the 'radical burn down the establishment' mentality, or the 'I just gotta get a job' focus - we jumped out of college and jumped into the marketplace. And started our family, which might have broken down our idealism a bit. But we were paying bills, buying cars, using credit and seeking to enjoy life. So where was our faith? Well even though we might have had a strong firm commitment to Christ in the 70's now we relegated ourselves to just going... To church, to promisekeepers events, to women's bible studies, etc. And unfortunately a level of complacency set in.

When I think about Busters I realize things began to change in these years. All of a sudden a college degree was less influential than it had been before, people wanted and needed a masters degree or doctoral degree. The world got smaller. Travel was easier and more affordable. Money was more available. They experienced the world at younger levels. Both in all of it's diversity and in its conformity. They wanted more things, better things, acquiring them faster.

But loyalty decreased. Professional athletes changed teams practically every year! So why should the Busters stay with a company for a lifetime. In fact there was a large amount of corporate distrust, so to save their lives they needed to keep looking around for protection but also for more. Authenticity was the evaluation word for religion and churches for Busters. Small groups & house churches increased, but also Mega-Churches. This was also the age when many prominent pastors were noticed for their moral failure (similar to corporate distrust). We wanted authenticity, but we lacked discipline to grow in God.

Finally the Millennials, this current generation, they would be about 24 yrs old down to about 5, now. So what are some of the signs: graduate from high school and stay home, go to community college (and a guaranteed admission into a state school in 2 years), less affluent, awareness of the brokenness of society: war, racism, religious & sexual bigotry, pornography, The Cosby Show vs. Modern Family, The GONG Show vs. American Idol. And in the midst of this confusion and loss of roles there is this desire to "Follow your Passion"! Worship, Church & ministry has become program or theme driven. "My youth group takes me to the Domincan Republic (either to the beach or to build churches or both), and we have 1000 at our "mid-week" or "Shack127" or whatever clever name we can come up with. Faith is expressed by branding and marketing.

So what is my proposal: nothing has changed in 65 years. Being a follower of Christ is not just hard it is impossible. The "works" that were required in the 60's and 70's are the same today and our commitment to them will give us the same result.

1) Follow Christ
2) Read the Bible
3) Talk to God and listen to Him
4) Meet with other believers
5) Share what I am learning.

What are you keys to Passion?

What should we believe?

In a recent exchange with a friend, we were talking about a public interview with a person who was fired because his personal views were different than the organization. It had to do with the fact that his views were becoming more liberal in a notably conservative organization. It was a Christian (some would say conservative/fundamental)organization.

For me, it begged the question: how do we handle diversity in the midst of the growing Christian community?

I have included my response to my friend with some minor edits.

"Very good interview. I really like the interviewer. She always does a great job of getting to the real person, rather than just the sensationalism. Once when she miscued on an interview, she came on the air and apologized and forced the interviewee to apologize as well! I was impressed.

A couple pointed comments:

1) Yes he was fired, but I do not believe this was his sole means of employment. I guess losing your job from a organization that you faithfully served for many years is very hurtful.
2) Organizations of the "religious right" have certainly lost credibility in the last 5 yrs. As has Dobson, FRC, moral majority, etc. And I think we have to ask is this good or bad?
3) yet the "religious right" are still holding to a remnant of loyalists, and they feel like that is a Biblical model. So I believe this core of loyalists, this remnant, as it were will remain loyal to the end.
4) these are hard issues. There is no one CHRISTIAN answer. The great value of the church is our unity in the midst of our diversity. You know this, we talk about it all the time.
5) I am an evangelical. I would even say I am a fundamentalist, in the proper use of that word.
6) does that mean I am a 6 day creationist? Does that mean I think adultery is acceptable and homosexuality is an abomination? Does that mean I do not think women can teach men from the pulpit? Does that mean I believe women must wear head coverings? I get confused over half these questions.
7) what is a fundamentalist today? A fundamentalist is a person who holds to the fundamentals of belief. A Christian fundamentalist, is one who holds to the basic tenets of Christianity. I think you are a fundamentalist! Really! The way you teach and model evangelism is a clear indicator that you are a fundy!
But fundamentalism has become a bad word. What it really means is a follower of Jesus Christ, who believes the Bible is authoritative, the trinity is real: Christ lived on earth & died so I could know God the Father and the Holy Spirit is active today.
8) all of this is confusing and hard! There are no easy answers."

Thoughts?

Friendships that last

As part of this sabbatical, we have been reconnecting with old relationships. We are staying with friends from Germany who we met in 1981! That is just about 30 years! It has been so great to reminisce, to laugh, to talk about those old stories. Seeing those stories from respective points of view. It's been refreshing, relaxing and restorative.

Last night a colleague from the 80's (Dale) came over. We met her husband for the first time. All of us had a wonderful dinner and shared about the greatness and goodness of God. We talked about how good God had been to us. There are also sad times that happen in the midst of just doing life. Times of inexplicable pain. But we push through it, knowing and trusting that God is good! Eventually we will understand.

Dale was telling us last night about one of the relationships from those ministry days, a "club kid" who she kept a relationship with long after his high school days. She was able to speak truth into his life through college. She helped him through life transitions, bringing the authority of the Word of God into his life, helping him understand sovereignty. Many times this took them far away geographically, but that didn't matter.

Dale was there for his years of dating and falling in love. She helped officiate at his wedding. She was the god-mother for their first child. And she participated in his memorial service after he was killed in Iraq from an IED that hit the vehicle he was traveling in (3 weeks before his return to the USA). In the midst of the plans that were being made by his local church and by the Army, Dale contacted many of the friends from those days in Heidelberg to invite them to his memorial. Many came.

What an example of full service ministry! Dale began to care for this kid, because he showed up at a CLUB meeting. She saw how the gospel permeated his life because of his background and hearing the gospel spoken directly through high school. She continued to care for him and love him through college and eventually through his military career. She advised and discipled him through transitions, promotions, family matters, love and marriage and fatherhood. Now, it didn't just stop with this kid, she ministered to his parents and his little brother as well all along the way. She still maintains relationships with all of them.

This woman who I have known for 25+ years. Provides me with an example and a model of ministry that inspires me to reconnect with many folks that I have seen pass through!

How do you maintain relationships through the years? Who are you REALLY Facebook friends with?
What is a long-term relationship?

Reading this this summer...

I just finished The Accountable Man, Tom Eisenman. Why is it so hard for us men to build real friendships? Tom gives a very brief (some of us also do not like to read much)and practical primer with narrative story as well as clear application to begin to move deeper into the lives of our friends.

It takes prayer, intentionality & initiative to pull this off. But with Tom's guidelines I think it can be very achievable. One of the key points in the book is his description of prayer and intersession. It is very clear and easy to put into practice starting today.

Other key points is a great description of forming a covenant commitment, planning on time and agreement to going deeper. Also how to handle failure and brokenness.

This book has given me many great ideas on how to develop these key accountable relationships with peers as well as students I meet with.

The 2nd Appendix has a list of over 100 questions to get discussions started and moving.

I highly recommend this book.

" I " ministry

It seems to me that it is hard to read a book, hear a sermon, talk to a minister where the primary subject is something other than the writer/speaker. It reminds me of that Toby lkeith song "I wanna talk about me, wanna talk about I, I wanna talk about number 1, oh me oh my!". Or something to that effect.

I certainly know the value of vulnerability and authenticity, (thoughts that will be reserved for another post). I mean even the great communicators, that you can get on podcasts, websites or CDs. It seems like it is more about them than it is about anything else, including Jesus. What is going on?

I have picked up a little moniker that I attribute to such messages. If someone asks me how was that conference when you heard "Mr famous person" my comment is: "Well it was a lot of "I Ministry".

Of course not always - I hear or read many books, articles, sermons where there is much to be gained and applied to personal faith. but it does seem like there is a lot of "I ministry" out there!

Now why is this bothering me: well it is a bit personal - (now I will engage in a little "I ministry"). Because this summer I am trying to get thoughts on paper from 37 years of ministry, and my desire is to make it about God, Jesus and people that I have met along the journey. But I am discovering that in many of the stories that I write the main subject is me! YUCK!

As I think about the story in my mind the main subject is God and His works. But when I write the same stories it ends up being about me and a verb. I said, I saw, I talked to, I heard, I went and on and on.

So the effort has been on trying to write a story then to go back and take the "I-s" out! It's quite humorous at times. Because sometimes when the I is gone the story seems empty (that is the opposite of what I am going for.

So I think this summer will be an exercise in personal discipline for me - not allowing "I" to be the central subject.

What do you do? How to you become more selfless as you live your life?

What is a Sabbatical?

I am officially on Sabbatical! It is a short one. It will be about 8 weeks altogether and it will have several components. Sabbaticals are a privilege, a benefit that Intervarsity Christian Fellowship gives to employees, after 7 years of service.

It is a personal choice. In fact most staff never take one. Probably because most staff do not stay on staff for 7 years, let alone 25 years. So what is it? It has Biblical a well as academic applications and campus ministry encompasses both of those fields. It relates to God taking a Sabbath after 6 days of creating. Then there are the Levitical ordinances of taking a year after 6 years of work and then a Year of Jubilee after 49 years. It is literally a period of time away from work, to get a different look (at life, at ministry, at people). It is designed to encourage you to develop in a way that if you did not take one you would? Be less prepared to further the ministry.

I have had one other Sabbatical. It was in 1996. We went to Europe and visited missionaries and Christian leaders in 7 countries and I was looking at the global church. It was a huge investment for me. I really learned so much about the change in the church for the 21st century and also about Grace.

This year is different. I have been responding to the call of God for 37 years. A lot has happened in those years. And to be honest all of those stories and all of those discipling principles have stayed in my head. And my head is full! I want to spend this sabbatical getting those things out of my head and onto paper or text or screen or something!

So for my sabbatical I am writing! HA! Kindof a joke - because for many years I have made fun of staff who write because if you write you can't meet with as many students.

Zo I am beginning to write. Not everything will be in a blog, but some things will.

You can help me...

Do you have a thought or a principle that you remember that might be beneficial... Let me know either by comment or email...

NO, NO, NO!!! Gores: please say it ain't so

I can't believe my eyes! The "model" political couple of the 20th century is calling it quits after not 7 years, not 15 years, not 25 years but 40 years!

What is going on? What are they thinking? Politics aside, I have admired this couple for about 30 years. They were always so openly romantic (obviously including "the Kiss"). They were supportive and together in the midst of difficulty and tragedy. It seemed like nothing phased them. They were in love above all else!

I remember when Tipper stood up for explicit language on music albums and CDs and was on the forefront of getting restrictions passed on sales to minors of explicit music, Al supported her. I remember various losses from the campaign trail and these two genuinely stood beside each other through it all. Who would have thought that from the Clinton years this would be the first primary couple to divorce?

And the reason? Really? They say in an email: "We have grown apart because of Al's travel schedule... And it is "mutual and mutually supportive". Oh come on now!!!

Yes marriage is hard! Yes divorce is rampant. But when you could have been a good role model, when you could have stepped up your responsibility, Mr Gore & Mrs Gore - instead you retreat and back away! You take the easy road...

Marriage tips:
1) Read 5 Love Languages by Gary ChapmanThe 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts
2) Read Love & Respect by Emerson Eggerich by Emerson Eggerichs (Author)Love & Respect: The Love She Most Desires; The Respect He Desperately Needs (Hardcover)
3) Think more highly of your Spouse than your self (Philippians 2:4)
4) Communicate, Communicate, Communicate!!
5) Young Couple married or preparing for it - forget about this awful story and realize that only with God will your marriage succeed!

So what is the church today?

At Rockbridge, I am in Small Group Vision Camp, there are 142 students in this track and 17 staff that are working to train them to lead small group Bible studies on campus in the fall. This group could be influencers and leaders of over 1000 students on 12 campuses throughtout Va., N. Carolina & S. Carolina. This is a pretty significant group of influencers, right?

In my small group here we are studying 1 Peter. Last night in our discussion we were talking about living stones and foundations like buildings. So I just asked the group a question... "So what is your view of the church, anyway?

Silence.... Finally one person said "You mean like a building?"

I responded, "Well not necessarily, but what do you think the church is? Is it a building? Is it a place? Is it people?" So for the next 15 minutes we talked about what we felt like the church is and isn't. We talked about the stereotypes. What we liked and didn't like about the church.

I learned many things from this discussion. But one think that resounded there. Is a huge discrepancy between my perception of the church and these students perceptions of the church! We need to get on board and begin to do some forward thinking about this issue. Because as we continue to spend millions of dollars on our buildings our followers are comfortable just meeting at Panera Cafe or a coffeehouse or a park. It seems like the primary elements of church is worship & word with Jesus Christ in the center.

So what is the church today?

Another semester in the books

Oh Rockbridge,
a little slice of heaven!
Why is it like this?

Well part of it for me is my years of Young Life roots. I have been coming to YL camps since 1972! Practically every year. From Frontier to Silver Cliff to Saranac to Windy Gap and now Rockbridge! So many significant spitirual moments at each of those properties. Each ltime I am at a camp God meets me in an incredible way. Sometimes it is is in my personal reflection on a retreat of silence. Sometimes it is through a talk by a staff member (both YL and IV) who speaks a truth in an incredible way that cuts through to my heart. But it can be through a casual conversation on a porch, or the hot tub, or on the zipline tower. Conversations that open us up to vulnerability, that allowj God to move into the gaps in our times, the spaces in our lives.

It is also the abundance of nature, mountains, green fields, rustic old buildings, and a different view. A break from the norm that allows me just to take a step back and look at all that God has given me. And to listen... To listen to Him. To think about all those scenes that have gone ahead - in this past semester, past year, past 5 years all the way back as far as i can go.

Also, it is the clarity of relationships with Godly people that makes this place even more holy.. The quick reconciliation of brokenness. It is no longer about not talking to someone who has hurt me a month or 6 months from now. If someone has offended me today I will be reconciled with him or her tonight! Even those relationships with people that kind of bug me it is easy to rise to the occasion, serve together and let God do the work.

But in the context of the times apart from Rockbridge. Those times back "in the world". It is easy to let those annoying traits in others stay annoying. Brokenness stays broken and jealousy stays jealousy.

So coming to Rockbridge for these 2 weeks let's me be different enough that the time brings me one step closer to God.